An Ode To The Electricity Lesbian | GO Magazine

I love me personally a
energy lesbian
. Give me personally a dyke with power, and my personal clothing are coming down. I Am Not really fussy about particulars—
butch
or
femme
, younger or older, slim or curvy—as extended since you have authority, you will be my personal type. Thus I want to compose an ode towards energy lesbians around the world: the daddy dykes, the
Bettes
, the tech queers, the bossy girls, the supervisor hotties, the lesbian using a headset and bossing me about, all energy dykes nowadays. That one is for you.

1. Electricity Matches Tend To Be Hot AF

The thing that produces me personally drool harder than perfectly charred octopus and fingerling potatoes is a hot dyke in a suit.

F*ck me personally right up.

2.

Energy

Lesbians Tend To Be Hot AF

I know this can be essentially the same reason I just mentioned, but it’s well worth pointing out once more, bitches. Energy lesbians tend to be HOT. Energy lesbians are SEXY. This goes

means

beyond mere looks; it’s an energy, a vibe, a swagger. It really doesn’t even matter if an electrical lesbian actually “hot” by societal criteria. Power lesbians are always, constantly, constantly hot, simply because they

tend to be

energy lesbians.

3. I Like to Be Bossed Around

The truth is, as an out-of-her-mind, anxious, always-late, dripping-in-spray-tan femme, I need a daddy to corral me. Positive, I’m able to manage myself personally in a specialist environment. (we give you day-to-day lez content material, you shouldn’t I?) But place myself out in the world, and I also would like to be guided and bossed around. That’s, if you can manage me personally talking back.

4. They Use Headsets

Precisely why? who will be they actually talking to? I do not care and attention.

5. Lunch Is Purchased

Cheapness makes my pussy dry out. Thankfully, power lesbians never ever play the absurd, “let’s split the bill” thing.

6. They Drink Sensibly

We have constantly got batshit insane, manic, celebration woman pals exactly who transform myself into a mom. I am like Mother Theresa when compared with some of the ladies just who, i have decided, tend to be my siblings. (Now we are more mature and far more boring.) But in yesteryear, I’ve needed to be the goody two boots, the caretaker, the responsible one (which is low-key terrifying), when in real life, I wanted to be the main one ingesting with reckless abandon, blinking the bar, and making discreet trips with the restroom. Having an electrical lesbian to take in responsibly and make myself feel safe permits us to function as insane party lady I often kept tame for the reason that my personal cray-cray buddies.

7. They I Want To Refer To Them As Daddy

During the terms of
Zara Barrie
,

PURR.

8. they truly are Too active through its Careers to find yourself in Semantics Wars on the internet

I love
energy lesbians
because they don’t care and attention whether you identify as
queer
,
lez
,
bi
, any. They actually have actually other stuff to be concerned about, like their email inboxes and work deadlines. Oh, and never to mention, these include adult adequate not to ever care exactly how any individual personally identifies.

9. They Tell Me I Am Very

Which, to my hierarchy of needs, has reached the utmost effective. And middle. And base.

10. Slaying the Patriarchy Is The Full-Time Job

Energy lesbians usually work with traditionally male-dominated industries, such as for example company, politics, tech, press, etc. To get the wherewithal to fight through the micro-aggressions they feel on an everyday basis—plus searching means sexier than their male competitors? The feminist icons we truly need.

11.

Confidence

Is Vital

For through every one of the misogynist stuff they handle in the office, energy lesbians require confidence. Thankfully, for dehydrated AF femmes at all like me, this self-confidence in addition translates into them unabashedly striking on women, immediately asking all of them off to their faces, and taking them home.

12. Fancy Cheese: The Best Aphrodisiac

Energy dykes always get elegant mozzarella cheese plates. I like to

eat

extravagant parmesan cheese plates.

13. We Feast on Oysters

Oysters include unofficial meals in the power lesbian culture. Thanks for arriving at my TED chat.

14. You Can Spot One Out Of Training

Once I found my sweetheart, she had no idea that she could attain full father potential. But I could spot it from a mile out. Which explains why I am going to be holding a daddy-in-training boot camp for anyone curious. In my bedroom.

15. They Do Things Besides Drink

Each goes on week-end visits. Each goes to galleries. They visit their families.

16. They’ve been Worldly and Learn About Publications, Caviar, and Paris

A rather cultured bunch, those power lesbians. Whatever they can study on me is Lana Del Rey’s entire discography, where to find best spaghetti in Ny, and how to attain their full daddy potential.

17. They understand How to Carry Out Fees

Which is hot.

18. Loafers Turn Myself On

LOAFERS ARE VERY F*CKING CUTE. Offer myself shiny men’s footwear on sexy energy lesbians or provide me demise.

19. Their Ego Is Substantially Less Than F*ckboys, But Their Swag Stays the exact same

All gender charm, not one of the immature games.

20. I JUST ADMIRATION THEM!

I must say I do.

Will you be an electric lesbian? Write to us for the feedback! Or, like, know me as.